Mind your language

At my agriculture college, I was some sort of a mini-celebrity, the reason being that I am fluent in English. My classmates, most of them from rural Maharashta, never seemed to realize that there are thousands like me, who speak the language of our former colonial rulers very well, in fact better than me. People would always seek my advice to improve their command of English. Honestly, most of them were horrible when it came to speaking the Queen's language. Being no teacher of English myself, I was often clueless about the guidance to give. My general counsel would be to listen to English news on TV and to watch English cartoons (unfortunately Cartoon Network doesn’t air cartoons in English anymore). They did not think it would help them. People on TV speak English too fast they would complain. I didn’t know what to say beyond that. But now I do know what to tell people when they ask me that question about English improvement. Watch movies on HBO, Star Movies or Zee Studios as they have English sub-titles for their English dialogues as that way people can improve their English listening and reading skills. Gradually they well start speaking well too. I feel like screaming this out from the rooftops. I so wish all people in our country become fluent in English. The Indian industry won’t face shortages related to employees who can’t communicate properly in English. Job seekers will find better employment. One more step towards development

Bipolar

I called up a friend at my university. I spoke to him after a very long time. He had a lot of things to talk about as usual. Power cuts, hampered work at his factory, English movies (he has a tough time understanding American and British accents), etc. I asked him about a professor who once worked at my college and who now works at the university. He almost immediately sounded agitated. He told me that this professor got married last November and is now allegedly dating one of his students at the university! His wife doesn’t live with him as she is at his native village. This professor had a similar record at my college although he wasn’t exactly dating any of my batch mates; he was flirting with at least 3 of them. This guy is an out and out hypocrite and a pervert who clearly has no idea regarding the utilization of his sexual energy. He had once admonished a whole bunch of girls including myself for wearing western clothes (read: a pair of denims and a T-shirt) and would constantly rant about the need to preserve Indian culture and Indian values. Bullshit! He was thrown out from our college for demanding bribes from his students for increasing their marks. Indian culture and Indian values, my foot! He was dating one professor at my college too. She was fortunate to have decided against marrying this bastard. Her parents, it seems, were opposed to the idea of accepting a non-Konkani man for their son-in-law. She is so very well settled today and ended up marrying a person much better than this asshole. I hate this man and I so wish I could skin him alive. But unfortunately, that’s unconstitutional.

Fair trial no matter what!

I've been reading people writing things like the arrested terrorist Qasab does not deserve trial and that he must be executed immediately. I partially agree with them. With due respect to our constitution, he does deserve to be executed but not without a legal trial. So must Pragya Singh and Colonel Purohit be executed. They are all equals. Hang them in public. Or even better. Burn them at stakes. Unfortunately, that's not in accordance with our Constitution. These idiots may make a mockery of it. But we must respect it.

Ban on Google Earth? Are we missing the point?

People have been talking about the use of Google Earth in the planning and execution of the terror attacks of the 26th of November 2008. A ban on Google Earth will prove completely pointless. Consider this: Google Earth was launched on 28th of June 2005, much after other terrorist attacks like the one at the Olympic village in Munich in 1972 were Israeli athletes were taken hostage by Palestine fidayeen, the hijack of the IC 814 in Kathmandu in December 1999, the hijack of the Indian Airlines flight 182 Kanishka by Khalistani terrorists in June 1985. Did the terrorists have access to Google Earth back then? The recent attacks in Mumbai took place because our security agencies failed to act on intelligence reports. Terrorists exploit loopholes in security and the callous attitude of administrative personnel at all levels. Troublemakers and terrorists will cause mayhem unless and until we become vigilant.

My Fair Lady

A fine morning on national highway .
I was in a ST bus on my way to college.
The bus halted at the toll counter on the way to Rasayani.
A man’s voice called out, “Natalia Hule.”
Nothing more.
Wondering who it was, I looked out of the bus window.
It was a stranger, who was smiling lecherously in my direction accompanied by his cronies.
It was the first time I saw him.
I was irked and worried.
I am no movie or TV star for strangers to call out my name on the roads.
Nor am I Osama Bin Laden for someone to have difficulties finding out details about myself.
I asked a friend at college if he had any idea about someone asking for me.
I gave him the description of that stranger.
He responded saying that it could be anyone. (I knew that)
He said that people in that area (Rasayani and neighbouring places) were crazy about fair girls.
The moment they spot one, they go to insane lengths to find out her antecedents. Never mind if the girl is ugly, it’s the pale skin that counts.
It’s a disease there.
I was shocked.
I understood why Fair & Lovely sells in this country.
We are congenital racists.

PlanetRead::Spread the Word

PlanetRead::Spread the Word: "[...] More: PlanetRead::Spread the Word"

We all live in a big poultry house.

Men are or have cocks.
Girls are chicks.
Hence, the world is a poultry house.
You were wrong Shakespeare!
This isn’t a stage.