Showing posts with label India. Show all posts
Showing posts with label India. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Unreligiously Yours

Friend: Hi Natalia.

Me: Hi! Howz life?

Friend: Good. What’s up?

Me: Head, hair and ceiling.

Friend: Bad joke.

Me: That wasn’t a joke. I stated a fact.

Friend: (irritated) Let it be. Hey tell me, what are you?

Me: (I was confused. What can one possibly present as an answer to that question?)I am a specimen of the Homo sapiens.

Friend: Now why do you have to get biology involved in this?

Me: What do you mean?

Friend: I mean like what are you?

Me: Well in accordance with human obsession and fascination for borders, I carry an Indian passport so that makes me Indian.

Friend: No, I mean what religion are you?

Me: How can a person be a religion?

Friend: Alright! What religion do you follow?

Me: Ah that makes more sense. Hee hee! Haa Haa! My name confuses you doesn't it? Natalia Hule does not give you a clue as to about whether I ma a Christian or a Hindu. My looks baffle you more because you can't associate me with a particular region of India and the fact that I speak Marathi, Hindi and English equally well worsens your case further. Haa haa, stay confused. I won' t help you... Well I follow ‘Nataliaism’

Friend: What?

Me: It is a very recent religion. It started the day I was born. This religion has only one Goddess, she is called Natalia. The Goddess has only one devotee, her name is Natalia. The religion has only one prophet, her name is also Natalia. The principles of this religion are whatever Natalia finds right. This religion prohibits conversion. The Goddess Natalia explicitly states that there shall never be any reincarnation or resurrection whatsoever. The Goddess Natalia does not promise any Land, Water or Air. By the way this Goddess, her devotee and the Prophet is all me, and not some other Natalia. In this manner, I shall remain in peace with everyone and anyone around me and also prevent any possibility of war and riots after I am gone, hence ensuring peace even after my demise.

Friend: Hey this idea is great. (I was slightly taken aback to hear this) Everyone should create their own religions and not bother others. What do you think?

Me: I think I’ll complete the assignment for French class.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

My Quest for French Literacy

There was a time, during the level 2 of my French studies that I was convinced that I would never be able to read French. After about 3 or 4 sentences, my mind would just go on a vacation to the Andaman and Nicobar Islands. I was persuaded to quit my pursuit of French proficiency. Then the money-minded element of my head told me that quitting would be equivalent to a waste of money! Now that was good motivation to continue. But it still did not solve my problem of having a slight headache while reading French; I just couldn’t read.

I then told myself that it would be advisable to concentrate on the Listening skills for a while. Since I reckoned that babies learn to talk due to prolonged auditory exposure to language, I subjected myself to a blitzkrieg of French songs and movies. It would also cause an annoyance. I plainly could not comprehend the sounds that the French people produced from their throats and mouths! Now I had to discipline myself. There was no way I was going to give up. So I started watching the French movies and cartoons along with the French sub-titles, hoping that I would understand the dialogues that way. So I discontinued French reading for a while. 2 weeks later, I read an article (not in French) in the Times of India. It changed my approach towards improving my reading skills.

This article was titled Power of subtitles and was written by Gurcharan Das. It spoke about the efforts of Dr. Brij Kothari and his work with DoorDarshan. This project is about subtitling of songs on DD shows like Rangoli, Chayageet and Chitrahaar. The viewer subconsciously associates the spoken word with the words displayed on screen, thus practicing reading in an unobtrusive and hassle-free manner. It involves no extra cost or time investment for the viewer. This method effectively increases literacy levels even with just 30 minutes of exposure to such programs every week. Thanks to Dr. Kothari’s mission, a Nielsen-ORG survey, conducted in 2002 and 2007 to measure the influence of subtitling, showed that only 25% school children could read a simple paragraph in Hindi after five years of education. However, this soared to 56% if they also watched subtitled songs for 30 minutes a week on Rangoli. Similarly remarkable outcomes were reported among adults.

This convinced me that I was on the right track and my methodology was perfectly sound. From that day onwards, I watched 2 French movies or animated films, along with the French subtitles weekly. That amounted to nearly 5 to 6 hours of French audio and visual exposure per week. I did that for 4 months. My efforts paid of in January 2008; I managed to read the French novel, L’Africain of J.M.G. Le Clezio in 10 days! I had become perfectly literate in French. J’ai devenu francophone! I wrote about this to Dr. Brij Kothari on his website http://www.planetread.org/home.php. He wrote back saying that my experience mirrored his own while he was learning Spanish. That was seriously cool. According to AC Nielsen’s ORG-Center for Social Research, there are nearly 312 million early-literates and 444 million non-literates in India. This estimated number of non-literates is significantly higher than the official figure of 296.2 million. I wish all channels start sub-titling their shows. Everyone stands to win. Channels get better TRPs. Higher literacy levels means better levels of income that translates into higher sales for advertisers. That is fantastic motivation to speed up India’s conquest of 100% literacy and the achievement of the Millennium Development Goals.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

It’s Raining Men, Hallelujah!

My friend: Tell me Natalia, have you ever seriously loved a guy?

Me: Yup. Next?

My friend: Just one guy?

Me: Hmm, nope, wait let me count them.

My friend: You're joking! Are you nuts?
Me: Nope, I seem to have a weird fortune with guys. Every time I like one I find out that he already likes or is dating someone else! Crazy isn’t it? But anyway, they were more like big crushes!

My friend: (Giggles) so tell me, how do you cope up in a situation like this? Can you just move on?

Me: Absolutely! Why should I create trouble for myself and the guy? It can get complicated. And besides, there is no harm if one guy doesn’t like you. India is full of men. Our predecessors have ensured that. They never wanted a situation where girls would have trouble finding dates!

My friend: Explain, explain! What do you mean by that?

Me: Well you see the sex ratio of India is 927 females per 1000 males. That means a surplus of 73 boys! So if I don’t get one guy, I know I still have 73 waiting in the line for me! Yipee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My friend: Natalia you seriously are weird! And what if you don’t find a match even amongst them?

Natalia: No, problems! I shall simply register myself on http://www.bharatmatrimony.com/ or http://www.shaadi.com/ . «Invited groom for tall, FAIR, educated girl, slim, whatever will be my age/ 5’4”, working from educated family, teetotaller, non-smoker, non-vegetarian. Caste no bar. » The moment people read the word 'fair', I shall be flooded with offers! No problems at all. I assure you, someone or the other will like me that way. But I pray to God that I don’t ever feel the need to register myself on those matrimonial sites! I am not an uninteresting character at all!

My friend: Hey of course you are not! We are just imagining some hypothetical situations. (Gleefully) It’s bad for the boys! I pity them. They don’t have as much as choice as we girls do.

Me: Oh no! Not at all! They can always go to Russia, Japan, and many other East European countries! All those places have more women than men! In fact the last time I read about it, there were 884 males per 1000 females in Russia and 1040 females per 1000 males in Japan! So boys need not worry at all. However, their families would! I wonder how most Indian families would react to their sons bringing home a European bahu (daughter-in-law)! The guy gets past caste, language and nationality barriers in one clean sweep! Globalisation at its best.
Digg!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Valentine's Day in a village

Most Indians go holidaying to their native place or their village during the school vacations. The major Indian festivals like Diwali, Ganesh Chaturthi or festivals of local importance cause mass bookings on trains and buses, leaving the Indian Railways and State Transport services burning the candle at both ends. Going to the native place at least once a year, is almost the single most important thing on people’s mind during the run up to the holidays or the festivals. But one of my friends does not care a toss about the visit to his native place during the vacations or the festivals. This guy goes into the “going to the native place craze” during the run up to Valentine’s Day.
"Valentine’s Day is round the corner. I won’t be attending college. I am leaving for my village” was his regular refrain 3-4 weeks before Valentine’s Day during all the 4 years of our Bachelor’s degree in my agriculture college. Everything else seemed of tertiary importance (saying secondary importance would amount to an understatement). The first time I heard him talking about his trip to his village for Valentine’s Day, my reaction was something like this:

Friend: Valentine’s Day is approaching. I am going to my village. (He was talking to someone else)

Me: WHAT? What did he just say?

That day I could not ask him the reason for some reason. I simply assumed that he had a loving girlfriend, who longed for him in his village, who was more important to him than food, clothing and shelter and that he would consecrate the weeks before Valentine’s for her to make up for his absence during the rest of the year. My imagination did shift into an overdrive but I had to assume an answer for his inexplicable frenzy to visit his native place for Valentine’s Day. He sure did disappear for nearly a month before Valentine’s and returned only a week after Valentine’s Day. This was too much for me. What could he possibly have done during such a long period? Frenzied love-making sessions for a month? Or did he belong to some bizarre cult that had its own month long celebrations and customs for Valentine’s Day that were hitherto concealed from the eyes of the world? I had to ask him.

Me: Hi! How was your trip to your village this time?

Friend: Fantastic. It was more enlightening than last year.

Me: Enlightening? What do you go to your village during Valentine’s Day for?

Friend: For the preparations for Valentine’s Day?

Me: What do you mean? I am lost. Are you trying to tell me that your tiny, distant village in Pune actually celebrates Valentine’s Day?

Friend: No. We don’t do such things in our village. (Emphasizes 'such')

Me: Then what do you do?

Friend: My uncle cultivates flowers. He has 3 greenhouses where he cultivates all sorts of flowers especially the ones that are demanded the most during Valentine’s Day. You see he exports flowers to Europe. This time of the year, we face a shortage of labour on the greenhouse for tending to the flowers. (He had all my attention) I go there to help him out. It is the best time to learn about flower cultivation and greenhouse management. I also get to learn a lot from his manager who handles the export part. I work myself in the storage and packaging sections for the flowers. We have to handle those flowers like we hold new-borns. They are very delicate and even slight damages result in revenue losses. It is a mad race out there amongst neighbours. I didn’t tell you. Most of my uncle’s neighbours also grow flowers. They wildly compete amongst themselves to produce the best flowers. They even tease and mock each other about if someone's flowers seem inferior than their own. It is seriously embarrassing if someone else’s flowers are better than yours. It is back-breaking work but immensely satisfying. Our flowers leave for Europe a week before Valentine’s Day and then it is the accounts work that takes up our time.

Me: Oh my! I could not even imagine this. (I felt ashamed of the possibilities that I had imagined) It must be hard work. I bet you know all that happens in a greenhouse off pat.

Friend: Absolutely. I can handle a greenhouse all on my own. My uncle totally trusts me. I feel that I learn more on the greenhouse than during our horticulture classes. But theoretical knowledge is also important.

Me: That is great! Are the revenues good?

Friend: Yes. It depends on the orders. We earn up to Rs. 6 lakhs for 5-6 weeks of work. But these people (purchasers) do not always pay up on time. Europe purchases lots of flowers during Valentine’s Day. For that matter, even Bombay and Poona have a huge demand for even Grade 3 quality flowers. Valentine’s Day is good for business. I love it.

Me: I agree with you.

I had actually learnt how a certain farming community in Pune benefits from Valentine’s Day celebrations. They even admit that they love it. I appreciated my friend's yearly pilgramage to his village for Valentine's Day. I wonder what the Ram and Bajrang worshippers, who protect our “Great Indian Culture” and would by now be receiving ‘pink chaddis’ with love, would feel about this.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

The Futility of Penalizing the 3rd child

There are talks in the Kerala government circles these days regarding the imposition of the ‘two-child’ norm for couples failing which they will be penalized Rs. 10000 per ‘extra’ child and disqualification of the 3rd child for of free healthcare and education. This rule might be forced to bring down the birth rate further. Kerala already has the lowest birth-rate in India. I sincerely appreciate and approve of their intentions but sadly, they have missed the point. I wish to know whether beggars, commercial sex workers and slum dwellers will be made to shell out the fine for it is always this category of people who seem to have a gaggle of kids with them. Making something compulsory will make people resent it. Moreover, it will add to the workload of our sufficiently stressed law enforcement agencies. Instead, there should be higher emphasis on sex education so that people started making educated choices in their sex lives. We must adopt a sensitive approach towards educating the masses about safe sex and use of birth-prevention methods. Experiments in Uttar Pradesh are already bearing fruit. In Lucknow, a youth-oriented initiative, called Saathiya, is working closely with chemists to educate clients, especially those from weak economic sections of the array of birth control measures available and even reducing the awkwardness associated with the sales of condoms. This has lead to an increase in condom sales, some areas even reporting a 300% jump in the sales of condoms. This project was launched by Private Sector Partnerships for Better Health and USAID, the development funding arm of the US government. A 2006 project called "Condom bindaas bol" was intended to tackle a fall in condom sales in 8 Indian states that represent 45% of the Indian condom market. The more recent launch of the "Condom Condom" ringtone to popularize condoms in These states – Bihar, Chattisgarh, Delhi, Jharkhand, Madhya Pradesh, Rajasthan, Uttar Pradesh and Uttaranchal - constitute 40% of India's populace of more than 1 billion. The Kerala government can take a leaf out of these initiatives and promote them instead of cooking up stupid money-minting schemes. The more recent launch of the "Condom Condom" ringtone to popularize the word 'condom' hits bull'e eye. It will undoubtedly help deflate the shame associated with the word in popular usage.

We cannot blindly imitate China and impose a ceiling on the number of children couples can have. China is slowly confronting problems related to an ageing population and low number of youngsters. The one child norm created a preference for boys, which in another 10 to 20 years may translate into higher crime rates by testosterone charged single males unable to find partners. The situation is also grave in countries like Japan, Russia and Germany where employment might take a hit if there aren’t sufficient numbers of young men and women to replace those who retire from active work life. The Japanese Health minister, Hakuo Yanagisawa, went overboard by saying that he wants 'birth-giving machines', aka women, to have more babies. It is easy to imagine the outrage he managed to cause! Germany is concerned about 30% of its adult women being childless by choice; the figure touches 40% in case of female who have completed graduation. The Germans have also debated compensating working parents with €3,000 annually for childcare costs against tax, urging women to have more children. A number of other countries facing declining birthrates have offered similar incentives. Australia offers a $4,000 additional benefit for each child and in recent times has proposed to reimburse all child care expenses for women who desire to work. Numerous European nations, with France, Italy and Poland, have offered some arrangement of bonuses and monthly compensation to families. Closer home, Singapore has a principally bountiful plan: $3,000 for the first child, $9,000 in cash and savings for the second; and up to $18,000 each for the third and fourth. Several Japanese regions, in the face of almost calamitous population loss, are offering rich incentives. Yamatsuri, a 7000 strong municipality, north of Tokyo, offers parents $4,600 for the birth of a child and $460 a year for a decade. In a throwback to the Stalin era, the Duma intends to tax childless couples either to encourage Russians to have more children, or make childless Russians help absorb the costs of the government’s maternal capital program, which gives 250,000 rubles (9,200USD) to mothers for the birth of another child. In fact, for every sixteen Russian deaths, only 10 Russian tots join the population. All the mentioned countries are now confronting the challenge of supporting the retirement of its seniors who are turning into an unproductive, economic burden in the absence of youth.

These nations mentioned here are naturally at the other extreme of the demographic spectrum, their problem being the antithesis of our problem. The irony of demographics across different continents should teach everyone some lessons. Undeniably, we do need to stop our people from breeding like vermin but that does not imply that we start imposing fines. The countries with low birth rates also have 97 to 99% literacy amongst their women. The government can do much good by improving sanitation and other facilities in schools so as to keep girls in school. The lack of toilets is often cited as a reason for girls dropping out early from schools. According to a survey conducted by National University of Educational Planning and Administration, only 37.42 per cent of the 11,24,033 schools in 604 districts had toilets for girl students. The absence of toilets can be a major disincentive for pubescent girls to pursue schooling. If local governance bodies like Gram Parishads and Zilla Parishads start ensuring that the local schools have separate functional toilets for girls and boys, that may help keep girl longer in schools, thereby increasing literacy and decreasing the chances of early marriage, often responsible for high fertility. All Indian states should adopt the scheme in Bihar, Mukhya Mantri Balika Cycle Yojana (Chief Minister’s Cycle for Girls Scheme), and provide cycles to girls for going to school so that transport between their residences and schools does not prove to be a hindrance for education. The Indo German Watershed Development Programme in Maharashtra has shown that watershed development in villages leads to reduction in migration due to lack of employment and leads to women’s empowerment. This also leads to improvement in literacy levels as children get to go to one school for an academic year and do not have to miss out on school due to their parents’ search for employment form town to town. The IGWDP has successfully shown that within 2-3 years of the implementation to a watershed management program, the demand for education amongst women rises. Higher levels of education do transform fertility rates as well as income levels. Better facilities for women will encourage more women to pursue careers. Dividing time between work and family, inevitably calls for a small family. That will predictably cause people to have just one or two children. Even if some families opt for bigger sizes that should not pose a problem.

Improvement in literacy levels cannot certainly be the only solution to high levels of fertility. There must be adequate efforts to improve the perception of the girl child. If people continue to consider daughters as liabilities, then early marriage to get rid of the ‘burden’ will be inescapable. The preference for sons also leads people to keep having more girl children in order to beget a boy. There also lies one cause of high fertility. But urbanization of semi-rural and rural areas may help curb such extremist reproductive behaviour over the coming decades although it may not reduce the bias against girls. Affluent areas of Bombay, Bangalore and New Delhi continue to have some of the worst sex ratios in the country, but at least the families remain small. There must exist efforts at the grassroots levels to convince people that educated women are beneficial to the family. Very often, people favour less educated girls for a daughter-in-law as they believe that better learned girls are disobedient and headstrong. This is far from the truth. Educated women take better care of their families as compared to uneducated women.

Keeping in mind the myriad problems of gender and perception of education that we have in this country, a fine to bring down the birth rate with prove futile. Those living below, on and slightly above the poverty line will be de facto exempted from such fine. People will not be treated equally when it comes to imposition of such fines. The attempts to reduce the birth rate should be sustainable and must be implemented in such a manner that we do not end up like China, Germany, Japan and Australia in about 40 years. Otherwise, it is our generation that might become a burden for our children who may not be sufficient in number to support an ageing population.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Four reasons why I will never have an arranged marriage!

Well, I have nothing against being introduced to suitable boy by my parents just as I don’t mind going on a date with someone my friends suggest, I might meet the love of my life in both the cases, but I do have certain problems with the manner in which arranged marriages work in this country.

  1. My first problem is that why can’t a guy find a girl for himself for keeps? Why does he need his parents to do that for him? Is he a man or a joke? (Ok, that’s directly translated from Hindi into English!)
  2. Next, How would I know if he is not some homosexual getting married to a girl just to please his parents? I have no intentions of being stuck in a loveless or a sexless marriage! Yuck! In case of a love marriage scenario, you can be assured of the fact that your boyfriend has the ‘hots’ for you!
  3. I am fair. Not like the Caucasians, but by regular Indian standards. In India, many men and their parents are obsessed about having a fair wife/ daughter-in-law to ensure that their future generations are good looking. (In India, you are good-looking if you are fair, that suffices.) I refuse to let my children being subjected to racism even before they are conceived or even before their parents had the chance to sleep with each other!
  4. Most importantly, I want to get married at my own risk, for my own sake and at my responsibility. No one other than my husband and myself shall be responsible for what happens between the two of us, even if we get a divorce! (I hope that never happens) I have a few friends who said that they will opt for an arranged marriage as in case of a divorce, it is their parents who are to be blamed and not them as they had, like good children, obeyed their parents wishes, and hence it is the parents who had made a wrong decision. What spineless, heartless creeps! Don’t get married if you can’t shoulder responsibilities! I don’t ever want to meet or worse marry a guy who thinks in this manner. Never!

Friday, December 28, 2007

INDIA

Formidable natural barriers protect the land of India. The Himalayas guard the north and northeastern frontiers; the Arabian Sea and the Bay of Bengal protect the Indian peninsula. Before the Partition, we literally had the Indus forming the northwest boundary of India. Amongst these marvellous guardians of the Indian sub-continent, the Indus was the most pervious. Here starts the story of our great nation’s name.

The early Aryans (probably coming from central Asia) who settled in India named the river the Sindhu, meaning ocean, a large sheet of water. Naturally, the land around and beyond the Sindhu came to be called the Sindh, the people inhabiting it were Sindhi and their language was Sindhi. The Persians pronounce the letter ‘S’ as ‘H’. Later on, when the Persians or the Iranians conquered India, the river came to be called the Hindu (better than calling it Hindhu!), the land became Hind, its people and language were now Hindi. Thus, everything related to this land was Hindi, but I wonder how the word Hindu came fit on people of a certain religion instead of all people living in the land. Maybe because other religions came to this land much later.

When the Muslim conquerors came to India, the place automatically became Hindustan – the sthan or place of the river Hindu/Sindhu. Its people were now Hindustani. The British probably pronounced the word Hindus as Indus, half eating up the letter ‘h’. Thus, the river was renamed Indus, its land was now India, and people and their culture came to be called Indian.

It is very sad that most of us have forgotten this and we continue to describe others and ourselves with unnecessary adjectives relating to stupid things like caste, religion, state of origin and in extreme cases even the districts where we came from! Irrespective of whether we have even visited our native places! No wonder this nation often finds being torn apart on account of macabre incidents taking place in the name of religion and caste. No wonder inter-caste and inter-religion marriages still face opposition in the society.

Our Preamble describes our nation as being a SOVEREIGN SOCIALIST SECULAR DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC. Let us all remember how the name of our great country originated. I think this will resolve all the unnecessary social conflicts in this country and help us to build a peaceful and progressive society. Let us honor the name of our nation and live up to it. We are Indians first and Indians last. No need for anything in between.



JAI HIND!

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An infectiously enthusiastic incorrigible optimist, insanely in love with and morbidly curious about life, death and everything in between.